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Jose Antonio Morales's avatar

That’s why men like to be with friends.

Believe me, we deal with our emotions, we know to feel. But we just do it in a different way.

We also like being alone sometimes.

I don’t focus so much on being seen or understood by the women in my life (wife, mom, sis), I just care for their respect.

Respect? Yes, respect to who I am, what I do, what I want to achieve, my time, my friends.

Thankfully they do.

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Becky Aig ✍🏻's avatar

I really appreciate this perspective. It reminds me that not all emotional processing looks the same and sometimes, respect is the love language.

The goal was never to paint men as emotionless, but to question the pressure to be unbreakable.

We all feel. We all need space.

Thank you for showing another side of the story 🫢🏻

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Jose Antonio Morales's avatar

Becky thank you for making the space for having the conversation. It is needed.

And you are also pointing at something else that is essential: at the end, we are all in it. In my view, it is more about inclusion than division… yes we are women and men, but under our genders and identities, we all share common ground.

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Jose Antonio Morales's avatar

I remembered this video, it holds lots of shocking truths. The delivery might be a bit provocative but I know you can get to the golden nuggets:

https://youtu.be/Q3WsgZZtL50?si=QRqeE2KUg90YAXJa

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Becky Aig ✍🏻's avatar

Thank you for sharing this. I watched the video and I can see why you called it β€œprovocative”. She definitely stirred the pot πŸ˜…

While I don’t agree with everything, it gave me a lot to think about. I believe many women (myself included) didn’t become β€œindependent” to push men away, but to protect ourselves and build identities beyond survival.

But I also agree that there’s space for men to lead, feel, or not feel in their own ways. And for women to stop carrying everything alone.

This conversation is layered. And I think what matters most is respect on both sides. We’re all trying to unlearn, relearn, and show up better, not just for each other, but for ourselves first. Appreciate the share πŸ™πŸ½

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Mark Williams's avatar

Thank you for writing this, more men need to hear it. πŸ‘πŸΌ

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Becky Aig ✍🏻's avatar

I’m glad it resonated with you Mark. Thanks for reading πŸ«ΆπŸ»βœ¨πŸ€—

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Philip's avatar

Very profound.

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Becky Aig ✍🏻's avatar

Thank you Philip πŸ€—πŸ«ΆπŸ»

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Ken Zane's avatar

When you see us men 'trying to be strong all the time' it isn’t performanceβ€”it’s purpose. It’s identity.

Your words got in my head... again. So I wrote this:

https://open.substack.com/pub/happy2bwritting/p/lions-tears?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android&r=5q32eg

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Becky Aig ✍🏻's avatar

Wow, I felt that πŸ”₯ Thank you for sharing this truly. I don’t think your words cancel what I wrote… they add a layer. A necessary one. Because yes, for some men, healing doesn’t begin in stillness, it begins in agency. In movement. In purpose. In doing.

And maybe that’s the point:

There isn’t one way to be whole. There isn’t one definition of vulnerability. Maybe your tears of fire are just as valid as someone else’s quiet breakdown.

Your post reminded me that softness isn’t always the medicine. Sometimes, it’s rising with grit, through rage, through motion, through sweat. That too is healing β€οΈβ€πŸ©Ή

So hey, if Superman needs a minute to punch the wall and come back stronger, I get it. Just don’t forget to check in with your heart after you rebuild the world πŸ˜‰πŸ˜€

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Ken Zane's avatar

I could not cancel your words if I tried.

You speak in thoughtful truths. Truths that resonate. Truths that in some small way… heal.

Thank you.

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Becky Aig ✍🏻's avatar

Thank you Ken 🫢🏻✨

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Harriet's avatar

Honestly, this posts needs to get to as much men as possible πŸ‘πŸ‘πŸ‘. Thank you for dropping this for the men

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Becky Aig ✍🏻's avatar

I truly hope it reaches the ones who need to hear it. Sometimes all it takes is one message to make someone feel seen especially those who rarely hear these words. Thank you for reading ☺️🫢🏻

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Christine Ruth's avatar

Thank you for this. I often think about this the pressure on men to perform and to be protector. If I feel that as mother, how much more do they?

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Becky Aig ✍🏻's avatar

That’s a power perspective. The emotional labor and pressure is so real and I love that you can see it with such compassion. We talk about strong women a lot (rightfully so), but men carry silent weights too… and it’s time we hold space for everyone’s inner world 🀎

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Kristen Lena's avatar

Love this Becky. And to our men, please know, it’s OK if you are not.

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Becky Aig ✍🏻's avatar

Yes, that part. β€œIt’s okay if you’re not okay”. Thank you for echoing this reminder so beautifully ✨

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